The cookie saga

Betty Crocker, I am not. Ever since my dear friend Lisa and I had a pretzel explosion when attempting to make pretzels, I have stayed away from the kitchen.

I decided to make Christmas cookies this year. I view baking like chemistry and see it as just a matter of mixing ingredients together. I read and re-read the recipe. I shop for the ingredients. I lay out all the ingredients and the equipment I will need to make said cookies.

I finished mixing the ingredients and start to put the mix onto the cookie sheet. I’m thinking to myself, “this mix looks a little watery, but maybe it will solidify once it starts baking.” So I put the cookie sheet into the oven. I am glancing around the kitchen and my eyes rest on the flour. Oops, I think I forgot to put the flour into the mix. So I quickly take the cookie sheet out of the oven, where the cookie mix is oozing everywhere. I scrape the mix back into the bowl and mix in the flour.

Back in the oven go the cookies. The recipe says to bake for 10 minutes. I am positive of that since I read and re-read and re-read the directions. Ten minutes go by and the cookies are still gooey blobs. Finally(!) after 25 minutes they look done, so I take them out of the oven. Unfortunately, some of the flour-less mix has dripped on the oven bottom and the oven is smoking up a storm. Oops. I am so busy trying to deal with the smoke, I don’t take the cookies off the cookie sheet. Double oops. They are stuck!

By this time, Mr. Ken has joined in the fun. He is shaking his head. I am sure he is thinking, “I will never allow her back in the kitchen again.” But Mr. Ken, being the nice person he is, saw how upset I was, so he says, “Well, you are really good at making salad.” No comment.

There is still a lot of cookie dough left to cook, but I am so worn out by all this excitement, I decide to call it a day. I also figured out that using a double-layer baking sheet messes up the cookies. Sure, they don’t burn, but they don’t cook either.

The next day, which is the day before Christmas and thus the busiest shopping day of the year, I head to our local hardware store to buy “regular” cookie sheets. Maybe these will do the trick. I tentatively put the cookie dough on the cookie sheets. I set the timer for 10 minutes. After 8 minutes the cookies are burning around the edges. Ack, what else can go wrong?

The cookies look a little funny, but they do taste good.

Looking back over this saga, I think next time I will use the “regular” cookie sheets, plus parchment paper so the cookies won’t burn. The use of parchment paper is suggested in the recipe, almost as an afterthought.

What fun experiences did you have over the holidays?